PART 10

I spun around like a top, completely panicked. Where could he possibly be? I finally spotted his behind: he had crossed the street and was speeding on his four hands towards the giant illuminated tree that, planted near the neighbouring public garden’s pond, dominated all the other trees. I ran after him, and when I got to the foot of the tree, my brother had already found refuge in its branches. I saw him climbing, climbing, upward and forever upward.

– Stop monkeying around and get back down here right now! I shouted.

When my brother got to the top of the tree, he turned around and looked at me with his protruding eyes while lazily swinging on the branch, the wind blowing up his far-too-big pyjamas, then sang for all to hear:

GOD SAAAVE OUR GRAAACIOUS QUEEEN! LOOONG LIIIVE OUR NOOOBLE QUEEEEN!

The snow was still falling on the city, and the speakers were now playing Silent Night. The tree’s electric garland shone, its light reflecting on the pond like a diamond necklace. To think it could have been a perfect day… The bag lady caught up with me and stopped at my side. Hands on her hips, she looked up. She seemed to like what she saw.

– Ain't vat a sweet Christmas angel, she finally said.

Bang! A first projectile hit my head, then a second. I realised that Barnabé was now bombarding me with pine cones. He aimed well, too: each one hit its target. I finally managed to leave the shooting area, lamely running to hide under the branches. The situation quickly became critical: every time I tried to leave – bam! – I got a missile in the eye on or on the thigh. What could I do? Try my luck again with the magic box? That was out of the question, I had understood that much. Climb up the tree myself? I was useless in gym. I wasn’t far from a nervous breakdown. Desperate, I turned to the only person who could help me, the bag lady:

– Help me, ma’am, please! I croaked.

The bag lady hadn’t moved an inch. Obviously, pine cone attacks were of no concern to her. She took the time to fill her pipe before telling me:

– Use yer 'ead, duchess. Come up wif somefing huge that’ll catch 'im off-guard.

At first, I didn’t understand what she meant. What kind of something huge was she talking about? I was asking her for help, and she was telling me I had to figure it out on my own! This was just too much!

– Look around ya, the bag lady insisted. Don’t ya tell me ya don’t see nothink!

Well no, I didn’t see anything, and she was starting to get on my nerves, this one! Still, I forced myself to concentrate. What was so interesting around me? The pond, the tree under which I was hiding, its needles, and on top of the tree, my brother turned into a macaque who was waiting for the perfect moment to give me an extra lump. And that was it.

My brother turned into a macaque, the tree, the pond…

Coming from God-knows-where – I didn’t know then, and I’m still not sure I know now – the beginning of an idea went through my mind; a luminous inspiration that took shape and that, slowly but surely, erased the state of confusion I was in. I looked at the bag lady again and, in the second that followed, I knew what I had to do.

I spread the branches and bravely let myself be exposed, shouting at my brother that I could see at the top of the tree:

– Hey, monkey-brain! Try to hit me, if you can!

Benedict spotted me, pulled his arm back and shot a pine cone at me that sped like a rocket. I barely had time to hide. I turned around the trunk, and repeated the same exercise over and over again. I went out into the open, taunted my brother, and he would shoot without hesitation. Finally – and the luminous inspiration takes place here – I stood near the pond and, staying hidden this time, I taunted my brother again. Barnabé put his neck out to find me… and found himself face-to-face with his own reflection!

Me, under the branches, I didn’t see anything. The bag lady told me what happened next: when he saw this grimacing monkey – that looked nothing like his favourite target – my brother was stupefied. Then he pulled his arm back and, underneath him, the apparition did the same. My brother had a moment of hesitation. He didn’t throw his projectile, but rather slowly waved as if he was in a parade. His reflection docilely waved back at him. What happened next was exactly what I had hoped: my brother screamed in terror. I had bet that until this moment, he had no idea that he had been turned into a macaque, and that was exactly the case! What I hadn’t predicted was the reaction that followed: he backed up suddenly, his head hit the trunk behind him, and he fell through the branches like a stone.

Benedict bounced two or three times on the branches before crashing at the foot of the tree. I hurried over, and the bag lady joined me to examine him.

– Don’t ya worry, duchess, she finally said. The branches slowed 'is fall. He’s only dazed, is all.

Then she told me every detail of what just happened. I was shaking like a leaf. Despite my plan’s obvious success, I wasn’t proud.

– What do I do now? I asked, out of breath.